When I Left I Took More Than Memories
by aleksa grey
Summary: Based 3 years on from prom when Meredith returns to Seattle but what secret is she keeping as she says goodbye to her mother.PLEASE read and review this is my first go so live for feedback!
1. Chapter 1

_**Chapter 1**_

Closing the door behind the miffed cab driver Meredith Grey watched him walk back to his car, silent the whole way from the airport his friendly questions hadn't even reached her as she'd stared out hungrily at the passing scenery. She'd noticed every little change whilst lost in memories that for so long she had refused to remember or wallow in. Three years since she had closed this door for what then had been the final time but then fate came into play deciding it was time for her to face the past she had run across the country to her cousin in Boston from.

She moved through to the kitchen, a rare smile lighting her eyes as they took in the mess, so welcoming so familiar that tears burned the back of her throat

"Home… "She breathed into the silence.

_Three years ago she had ran, ran away from Finn the man whose love she could never return. From the hospital that she loved and the friends who had became her family, but mostly from the man who haunted her nights only to disappear at sun rise. The man who had broken her who she would love till the day she died but who would never be allowed to shatter her world again._

_Richard's call had caught her in the middle of a busy shift to destroy the world she had built up for herself and her son Cameron, with the news of her mothers admittance to Seattle Grace and downhill spiral it had brought her back as little else could._

"Meredith! Your back... Your home" Tripping over his own feet George embraced her holding on for that little bit longer.

"Move over Bambi!" Pushing him out of the way Christina embraced her "You're my person…"

"I'm your person…" Breaking apart they laughed as Izzy moved forward

"I'm glad your back, well not about your mother of course but just glad your back!"

Sat around nursing coffee they filled her in on the gossip all purposely avoiding one mans name,

"You did bring Cameron though right?" It was George who asked his eyes having not left her face once in the past ten minutes

"No he's back in Boston."

"Good because McBaby in the same city as McDaddy McDreamy and McWife… Wow now that would be one hell of a McMess!"

"Christina…" All three shouted.

"Oh shut up, you were all thinking it but Bambi and little Miss Sunshine didn't have the guts to say it."

All three laughed as Meredith beamed

"It's good to be back,"

Dr Derek Shepherd found the Chief stood in the doorway of the private room his eyes set on the motionless figure hooked up to all the machines.

"How's she doing?" he asked his only answer a somber shake of the older mans head

"I've rung Meredith Grey…" Chief Webber turned in time to see pain fill the eyes of his old friend before the shutters came down once more bringing back the empty laughter less look they had all gotten used too.

"I thought you might."

"Might what?" Dr Addison Shepherd asked from behind interrupting what the Chief had been about to say, whilst she pretended not to see the slight flinch as she rested her hand on her husbands shoulder.

"I was explaining to Derek that I've advised Meredith Grey to come,"

A sour look passed over Addison's face "Well, now won't that be cozy the ex girlfriend coming home, I know lets invite her over."

"I have patients." Derek brushed past his wife his body tense as he moved off down the hall seeing nothing or no one but the smile of the girl who had walked out of his life but not out of his heart. Her memory was every where all over the hospital, every time he went to Joe's she was at the bar, scorched into his brain so every time he closed his eyes it was she he saw.

Everyday of the last three years he'd tried to make his marriage work tried to recapture what they had lost but for him and for everyone else to see his heart just wasn't in it. He loved Addison for what they had once had and she'd forgiven him for sleeping with Meredith at the prom but he wasn't in love with her the way she deserved to be loved. He let out a bitter laugh at the thought of the name he'd been christened with in his first week here "McDreamy" those days seemed little more than a dream now and he was stuck in a nightmare.


	2. Chapter 2

_**Chapter 2**_

"Are we going to talk about this Derek?" following her husband across the lobby Addison had to work to keep up with him

"Not now Addison." Quickening he stepped into the elevator as she stopped

"That's what you said last night and again this morning!" she called out earning herself no response as the doors slid shut on his impassive face.

"So Meredith Grey is back…" Mark Sloane whispered grinning as she turned on him

"You know??"

"Nothing spreads faster than gossip in this place Addy you know that. Plus is it just a coincidence that news of Meredith's return sinks your marriage into more trouble??" Raising a skeptical eyebrow Mark stroked a finger down her cheek

"My marriage is fine…" Addison argued stiffening at his touch

"Wake up Addy there has been a third person in your marriage, in your bed and in Derek's heart ever since he thought staying with you was the right thing to do!"

"Wake up to this Mark planes just don't fly into Seattle they fly out too…" Storming away she tried to ignore his husky chuckle

"Why don't you show me, we can test that theory out for ourselves?"

"O'Malley you're with Burke, Karev Dr Montgomery Shepherd, Stevens with me and Yang Dr Shepherd!" Dr Bailey ordered, her hands moving to her hips as Christina hesitated

"Do you have a problem Yang?"

"No Dr Bailey its just do I have to be with Shepherd today of all days?

"Do I look like a happy smiling hostess who in anyway cares what you want, do I Yang?"

"No Dr Bailey…" Christina muttered scurrying past her only to bump into Burke "And you couldn't of asked for me today?" she asked walking alongside him

"Why who have you got?"

"Shepherd and not she Shepherd…" laughing he nodded at the man approaching them "Derek."

"Preston." He stopped in front of Christina as she threw daggers into Burke's back while he walked off chuckling.

"Yang Mr. Phelps in 3142 needs a MRI and I need blood work ran on Mrs. Meyer in 3144."

"Yes Dr Shepherd anything else?"

"How is she?"

"Who Mrs. Meyer, no idea never met her before." Christina raised cold brown eyes only to be met with the look that had earned him the title McDreamy.

"Meredith?"

"Go to hell…" Brushing past him she only stopped when he shouted

"Dr Yang!"

"Just for this minute I'm not Dr Yang I'm the best friend of a girl you broke not just once but twice..." Moving back towards him she laughed harshly at the hurt look on his face "Oh don't look at me like that I'm not one of the nurses who swoon at a smile… She loved you but you chose your wife, fine she dealt with that the best she knew how she was mending! But you couldn't let her do that could you???"

"Dr Yang…" he interrupted taking her arm and moving them both into the stairwell "She ran away she didn't give me that chance?"

"And you wonder why? You messed her up she couldn't risk giving you that chance …"

"I loved her!" Running his hands through his famous hair every muscle in him tense but he still stepped back as Christina moved forward "You don't deserve her!!!" And with that she slammed out leaving Derek knowing everything she said was true he didn't deserve her.

"_Meredith's gone Derek, I set up a transfer at her request." Richard had sat him down telling him what no one else would, her friends were tight lipped hatred in their eyes._

"_You helped her leave?" His whole world crashed around his feet, his heart broke, and coldness seeped into his soul._

"_She's Ellis's daughter Derek, I was the cause of damage to her life once before I owed her this."_

_He had just sat there too stunned to move cradling his head in his hands not able to believe she was gone his Meredith had left with no goodbyes, leaving him no chance to stop her._

"_Take the day off, find your wife…" Richard had told him as he'd stumbled to his feet his eyes radiating loss beyond words as tears choked him._

_The rest of the day was pretty much a blur, sat at Joe's one drink after another but what he did remember was Miranda Baileys words from some point during the night._

"_Don't think I've got any sympathy for you mines all with that fine women you've ran out of town! Don't even think about interrupting me, now what you do is let her mend do you hear me leave the poor girl alone!"_

_Over the last few years he'd heard her name crop up and knew she stayed in close touch with her fellow band of interns but he knew he had lost the right to ask just like he should have known today!!!_

Meredith stood outside the hospital looking up at the glass fronted building knowing once she stepped through those doors there was no more turning back.

"Hey Grey stop looking so dark and twisty…" a wide smile lit her face as she turned her head towards the direction of the familiar voice "Dr Evil Spawn."

"So you missed me then and if it wasn't for Izzy I know you'd be jumping my bones." Alex hugged her close but kept a tight hold of her hand "Come on they sent me out to drag you in and if I cant there sending out crack whore Christina to kick your ass!"

"I can hide behind you right? I mean I'm small your big I don't have to see anyone right? No of course we don't your evilness will protect us both!!!" she babbled earning herself a twisted grin "That's why we missed you Grey no one talks crap so well,"

He left her at the door to her mother's room promising the others would be up on their break, but Meredith didn't hear her mind could only see one thing. Her mother seemed so small hooked up to all the machines that she dealt with every day but at this moment seemed totally alien to her, moving forward she clasped the frail hand.

"Mommy," she whispered tears escaping not just for this women lying so close to death who had been distant and untouchable but for the mother she could have been, the grandmother she was never given the chance to be. Pulling up a chair she sat close just watching the face so like her own and holding on tightly to the frail hand.

"Meredith?" the voice that had broken the news to her, had cared for her mother since her own departure spoke now but it was as if he wasn't really there

"She's a grandmother and she doesn't even know, she will never know." It wasn't till the words were out that she realized what she had said, Chief Webbers eyes were full of sadness as he crouched down beside her

"I know it was never easy between you both but I think she would be glad you're here…"

"Thank you,"

Tears were falling fast now and Chief Webber did the one thing he could do for the women who had been the baby whose diapers he had changed, the child whose parent's marriage had broken down because of him, the intern he'd watched suffer heartbreak and the daughter of the women he'd truly loved he pulled her into his arms.

Later as they sat one on each side of the bed Meredith told him about Cameron, showed him the photos she always carried.

"Derek doesn't know…" It wasn't a question; his eyes never rose from the grinning toddler

"When I left I didn't know I was taking any more than memories."

"Will you tell him?"

"Honestly I don't know, maybe it would be more fair if I didn't." At this Richard raised tired eyes "Sometimes loving someone enough means walking away you loved him enough to do that before but for all he's tried Derek hasn't gotten over you!"

These words caused her heart to jump into her mouth edged with a touch of guilt for the child he would never know because of her but this was soon forgotten in the remembrance of all the pain this one man could cause.

"I wasn't strong enough for any more pain I don't think I will ever be for that much hurt again."

"I know and I do understand," coming round to her he pressed a fatherly kiss to her hair squeezing her shoulders "Your mother would be very proud of you Meredith just as I' am,"


	3. Chapter 3

**CHAPTER 3**

Derek knew once again he and his love life was the main topic of hospital gossip, he felt their eyes follow him with interest especially those who had watched it play out the first time around. Finally fed up with the curious glances and probing questions in between surgery's he found solace in an empty on call room, alone just how he wanted to be till the door opened.

"Oops I thought… I mean I'm looking for Alex." She quickly turned to go but Derek knew out of all of her friends he might have a chance with Izzy who was a lot more forgiving that Christina.

"Dr Stevens,"

"Yes Dr Shepherd?" The resentment he saw in all Meredith's friend's eyes was still there but slightly less hostile "How is she?" Asking the same question he'd asked Christina he was half expecting the same response but Izzy saw something Christina hadn't. She saw pain, sorrow and heartache the same look you would catch in Meredith's eyes at unguarded moments and it touched her for she knew all about heartache. She was lucky finding two people who were right for her who made her complete but maybe that was it for Derek and Meredith maybe it was just the two of them they were the other half of each other.

"She's being Meredith, but she's sad, hurting and I think a little scared…"

"Thank you," His voice little more than a whisper and so full of gratitude stopped her leaving

"Dr Shepherd if you don't mind me asking, how are you?"

"I'm… sad Dr Stevens incredibly sad." Tortured blue eyes met hers now filled with pity but she also felt embarrassed so nodding moved to leave but stopped again just before she went out to speak over her shoulder then closed the door leaving her comment hanging in the air

"Love can do that, it can make you the happiest person or the saddest there's no in between!"

"Grey, go get some food and stretch your legs!" Bailey ordered from the doorway but Meredith shook her head

"I'm fine,"

"No your not but your too damn scared to leave incase you bump into "Dr McDreamy", but you wont he's in surgery."

"Will you… Its just I don't want…. But if your too busy?"

"Grey, shut up. Il stay with your mother till you return." Bailey pushed her out of the room and Meredith found herself laughing "I'm glad you haven't changed and gone all soft,"

"Scoot now."

Bailey's smile was warm it was good to have all her suck up's back but it slipped ever so slightly at the photo propped against the vase of flowers, picking it up she read the small pen written note on the back "_Cameron, twenty months"_

"Oh my poor silly foolish girl," she said aloud staring down at the small boy so like his father it took her breath away.

With the knowledge Derek was in the OR she felt happier wondering down the halls to the cafeteria but this feeling was lost as she stepped into the elevator on the way back to her mother's room. This had always been their place she thought with a sinking feeling that it would be again as it reached the next floor causing her to move back against the far wall. Her heart halted as the doors opened and she knew without a doubt when she raised her head she would see him for the first time in three years, the man who had on more than one occasion held her heart in his hands.

"Meredith…" His voice that voice that would come in the darkest hours of the night leaving only an echo behind by morning.

Her head raised slowly her eyes savoring this first look at him, he was still the same, he was still him, he was still her McDreamy was all she could think as she met those unforgettable blue eyes. Derek felt his heart go into overdrive then stop as those beautiful eyes the windows to her soul met his, she hadn't changed she was still her she was still his Meredith. Finally he stepped into the elevator to stand facing her, neither spoke simply drinking from the others eyes too scared to blink in case it broke the dream. Derek's fingers itched to run through her hair he craved the feel of the soft silky strands but he felt no right and he was scared. Meredith traced each feature and knew if she touched his sculptured jaw stubble would tickle her fingers sending desire pulsing through her but she too was scared. Derek knew he didn't have long she would go again just as in all his dreams, so throwing caution to the wind he gently barely touching her stroked her face her indrawn breath a clear sign this was a mix of heaven and hell for her too. Finally he cupped her cheek when she didn't repel his touch he kept it there only for her to turn her face so her lips pressed his wrist branding him hers forever. Just before he broke the contact he spoke for the second and final time

"I missed you…"

Meredith left without a word still in that dream till she reached her mothers room, Bailey saw that look and knew it all too well to ignore it only one man had ever put that look on Meredith Grey's face.

"Sit down and drink your coffee," her tone brisk her eyes understanding "Damn that man." She said quietly but Meredith heard

"I thought it would be different… that it was over that I was done," she shook her head needing to cry but she'd stopped crying for him along time ago.

Bailey found him easily enough in an empty gallery looking over a darkened OR, Derek was lost to the world he was still back in the elevator with the girl his mind had tried to forget but his heart never could.

"I always knew you were stupid but the stunt you just pulled was plain mean, I don't want to know the ins and outs but couldn't you control yourself she's about to lose her mother she doesn't need you and your dramas too!" Bailey stood hands on hips waiting for his response

"I love her,' was all Derek said but Bailey shook her head

"Its not about you fool or your feelings, everyone in this damn hospital knows that you love her even your wife but Meredith Grey doesn't and at this moment in time its not something she should hear. You're a married man distance yourself and start thinking about others your wife included!" Bailey stormed out leaving Derek to stare after her; the first person she saw was Izzy and pulled her aside

"Dr Stevens go to Grey she's in her mothers room I think she could do with a friend!"


	4. Chapter 4

_**Chapter 4**_

"You know I think the dude loves her…" Alex told Izzy as they watched Dr Shepherd perform surgery

"You do?" George turned in his seat to stare at Alex.

"Me too," Izzy agreed smiling at Alex "He hasn't shown any emotion or any sign of life in three years then wham Meredith's back and today he looks like he used too after a big fight all… sad!"

"The dude loves her and she loves him it's just so obvious'"

"You think still…." George butted in again and Izzy laughed "Oh George, you're so blind they're meant to be!"

"It's just a matter of time." Alex nodded George shook his head "Meredith wouldn't, not now anyway…"

"He's her McDreamy." Izzy sighed romantically but looking past her George caught sight of someone none of them had realized was there.

"The wife, the freaking McWife!" he whispered for both Alex and Izzy to turn in their seats in time to see Addison clearly upset but trying her best to hide it leave.

"Do you think she heard, maybe she didn't, should we go and apologize or something?" George asked only for Alex to smack him over the head

"And say what baby boy? We're sorry your husband still loves our friend yeah great idea George!"

Addison after leaving the gallery found herself heading towards where Meredith Grey would be. She knew everyone assumed she hated her but she didn't, she often thought if they had met under different circumstances they even would have been friends. Meredith hadn't lured her husband away, Derek had not gone out of his way to hurt her they were just two people too in love to let go and though it had broken her heart she had accepted it and stood by him. Now it still hurt but it wasn't breaking her heart Meredith or no Meredith the last three years had proved Derek's heart wasn't in this marriage it went wherever Meredith Grey was. She stopped at the door not knocking instead she peered through the small window and the sight of Meredith looking so young and lost filled her with sympathy despite all their past differences. With her decision already half made she turned on her heels and fled before anyone saw her.

Derek was getting ready to leave the hospital for the night when he was approached by Izzy and Alex hand in hand.

"I did not tell you this, Meredith will be by herself for a couple of hours but I didn't tell you that especially if Christina catches you!" Izzy whispered and Alex nodded "And you haven't even seen me!"

He found her stood with her back to the door staring blindly out of the window, at first unsure he stayed standing in the doorway but when she sensed his presence Meredith slowly turned. The distress in her face and the way she stood made him forget everything, the lonely painful nights, his anger at her for leaving, the memories of fights and bitter words, leaving only his love for her. Purposefully he walked slowly giving her every chance but Meredith didn't want him to leave, if just for this night she needed him to hold her. They fitted together jus as they always had, hard lean muscle merging with soft curves,

"Please don't talk; tonight I need you not to talk." She whispered into his chest her head under his chin and as she wrapped her arms around him she let the tears fall for them as well as her mother.

Christina bringing coffee a few hours on into the night stopped just as Derek had done in the doorway, in the dim light she saw them sat against the far wall Meredith asleep in his arms. Blue eyes met brown for the second time that day but this time Christina didn't say a word but left as quietly as she had came leaving the coffee's on the table.

"I thought you were keeping Grey company," Burke asked when she joined him in the on call room

"Its fine she's asleep."

"Christina…"

"She's asleep, Shepherd's with her!"

"Shepherd?"

"Yes that's what I said, Shepherd Dr Shepherd, Derek, Dr McShitty himself!"

"Are you angry with her?"

"No. Him yes but Meredith no!"

"The past might not have been perfect but she obviously needs him."

"Why, we're all here? He's a piece of crap it was because of him she left!"

"Tonight she needs more than friendship she needs him she needs love Christina!"

"Love sucks." She growled back but was drowned out by his kiss.

He didn't leave her once, they didn't speak, didn't kiss he just held her making up for all those nights he hadn't been there, the times both had longed for this contact. Nurses came and went and it was plain to see his presence would be known throughout the hospital by lunch but he didn't care, he was here with her that was all that mattered.

It was early morning when Meredith finally moved away

"Thank you," she softly said as she stood up but looking up at her he shook his head "I had to be here."

"Why?" Meredith was curious they'd spent hours together not talking; it had given her comfort but what can he of got from it.

"Because you needed me,"

"I did," she smiled tenderly and he gave the same smile back "You did."

As soon as she got back to the house Meredith rang Boston, speaking to her cousin for a few minutes but mainly to Cameron, excited to hear her voice he chattered away not always making sense but she loved it. Her bright smile stayed till she reached the kitchen and George.

"What's wrong? Why are you looking at me like that?"

"I'm disappointed…"

"Why, did you want a shower I haven't used all the hot water!" she said turning to Izzy and Alex for answers

"Baby boy's upset cos you spent the night in McDreamy's arms."

"I did not. It wasn't like that and how do you know?" she was confused and looked at each one in turn

"Callie!" Izzy grimaced turning it into an instant smile as George turned to her "Everyone knows,"

"Well they don't its no ones business,"

"But what does it mean?" Izzy asked placing coffee and pancakes in front of Meredith "It means… I don't know what it means, I needed him and he was there that's all I know."

"What did I tell you both the dude loves her?" Alex nodded full of self satisfaction.

Addison was waiting when he reached the trailer her eyes still red from the tears she'd shed the night before, neither spoke at first as he joined her on the steps.

"I'm sorry." He meant it and Addison knew that as she reached for his hand, she wasn't angry she was hurt but not angry.

"You've tried Derek, we both have but we need to face that you're not going to get over this, this is not something that will pass, and you love her!"

"She's back for her mother not me, if she had loved me she would have come back sooner!" His voice broke as she squeezed his hand and it took all her effort not to cry again. "Addy I'm so sorry."

"So am I Derek, I thought I could fight for you but I cant not again. If you had come home we might have tried but…"

"Meredith needed me; it wasn't a choice I didn't think I just knew I had to be there."

"And that's why there's no fight, you don't have a choice to make because you already made it. Your heart made it before I came to Seattle it just took a while for your brain to catch up!"

_Addison had spent the night going back over the last three years remembering things she had wanted to forget. He'd drunk himself into oblivion the day Meredith Grey left then he had buried himself in his work pulling it together for the outside world, but you only had to look when he didn't know he was being observed to see the anguish that was eating away at him clearly in his eyes. It had nearly killed her to watch his torment but he hadn't wanted her help and she hadn't known how to reach him in the darkness he had retreated too. _

_At first he had turned at the other Interns voices expecting to still see her, but then when acceptance came he stopped caring stopped turning and seemed to die inside. She had turned to Richard for help but as he had never really gotten over his own relationship with a women named Grey he could only tell her what everyone else had told her to do give him time to heal. So she did and he had tried but what they had once enjoyed was lost to them and she now knew it would always be._

"I thought I would forget her," Derek's voice brought her out of her thoughts and she smiled sadly

"I hoped you would…"

"I never wanted to hurt you."

"I know."

"Our marriage is over…" He whispered

"Our marriage is over…" she whispered back as his arm moved around her to bring her head down onto his shoulder as they sat lost in memories and silence.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

Meredith could feel her mother slipping away it was the twist in her stomach that entwined with the overwhelming sense of uselessness that made her want to run, run as far away as possible. One thought and one thought alone stopped her from doing this, she could not let her mother die alone. Her friends stayed close hardly an hour passing without one of them there except for one person the person who though she hated herself for it she wanted to see most of all. It wasn't hard to know why, the whole hospital was talking about the fact he had spent the night with her at her mothers bedside. Meredith turned as the door opened to find Bailey watching her only to feel a stab of disappointment

"I can feel it, death I mean it's almost like there is a third person in the room." For once Bailey had no answer "Its okay I know she hasn't got much longer…"

"But how are you holding up Grey?"

"I'm fine… I don't think she ever wanted kids, we were never close she lived only for her work but she is still is my mom and I still care."

"But now you're a mother you find it harder to understand?" Bailey closed the door behind her as acceptance replaced the shock on her face

"You know…"

"I know…."

"I should be surprised but I'm not, your Dr Bailey you always end up knowing everything!"

"Maybe you should tell your friends that it would save them from the effort of lying, but I saw the photo."

"I do find it harder now but I've learnt from her mistakes I don't blame her!"

"Your son is a beautiful boy he's the image of his father **not** that you would ever hear me calling '_him'_ beautiful!" a rare smile lit up Meredith's face "He is. Izzy took the photo you found it's my favorite."

"So all of them knew but the father doesn't???"

"Christina was at the birth, first time I've seen her lost for words, you would have loved the look on her face. But you understand why I couldn't tell Derek?"

"You were hurting and you had left but also you wanted him to want you not just you cos you were the mother of his child. So yes I do but be careful secrets don't…"

What she had been about to say was lost as the pulse rate and BP started to drop causing the alarm to sound, Meredith's eyes swung from the machine to Bailey.

"Richard, The Chief he needs… wants to…."

Bailey ran out of the room as Meredith moved closer turning the alarm off then bent over to kiss her mother

"I'm here mommy; don't be scared you're not alone! I never blamed you mom I know you did your best." She kept hold of her hand as she turned to find Christina and Bailey watching with tear glazed eyes

"He's coming…"

The Chief reached them out of breath looking older than his years, moving closer he stared at Meredith

"She'd want you here" she echoed his own words to her as he moved to kiss his old loves cheek

"I'm sorry Ellis and I do love you I always have…" His whisper was little more than a breath but Meredith heard and smiled through her tears.

She thought she could do this hold on and be strong but as the Chief called it her strength broke, she ran pushing past Christina and Bailey ignoring their cries as she fled into the corridor. But blinded by tears she didn't get far running straight into something solid but warm not cold like she felt, a familiar scent a male scent over took her as arms wrapped around her instinctively pulling her close against him. She didn't fight it she'd been fighting it for three years and today like last night she needed to be weak to give in to her heart.

"I've got you its okay, everything will be okay! I'm here I'm always going to be here."

The news spread quickly of Ellis Grey's death and Addison was surprised to see Izzy return not even half an hour after leaving to be with her friend.

"Stevens you should of stayed with Meredith Grey,"

"Oh Christina and… well Christina has taken her home." Izzy looked embarrassed giving her that same look she'd seen throughout the day as it spread where her husband had spent the night but more importantly with whom.

"And Dr Shepherd has gone with them…"

Izzy didn't know where to look or what to say, how do you explain the way Derek had cradled Meredith in his arms as if she was all that mattered, the way he had buried his face in her hair uncaring of who saw or what they thought.

"Its okay Dr Stevens I wasn't looking for an answer,"

Addison felt sorry for Meredith how could anyone not but today she needed an escape. An escape from her soon to be ex husband and his love for another woman, she needed to feel loved to feel special to be the only women a man was thinking off.

"Thinking about me?" a husky voice asked and Addison smiled sadly "I'm not sure,"

Mark Sloane gave his best McSteamy look and she couldn't help but respond to it and tell him what she had told no-one else

"Derek and I are getting a divorce, Meredith coming home has made him, and us face facts…"

Mark felt the excitement ripple through him, he'd waited nearly four years for this, he'd lost the closest thing to a brother he ever had but he knew at this moment in time it was worth it.

"Finally the D.M.C wins out…"

"The what? And what does that have to do with my divorce?"

"The Dirty Mistresses Club, Meredith loved Derek and I was crazy about you it seemed appropriate."

Addison couldn't hold back the laughter "You had a club..."

"We had a club… So how about you let me take you out to celebrate this long overdue divorce??"

PLEASE READ AND REVIEW, LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK OR WHAT YOU'D LIKE TO SEE?


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

Meredith half asleep gave a restless sigh her head resting in Derek's lap, one of his hands locked in a tight grasp with hers, the other moving through her hair as if he was soothing a frightened animal. The tears had subsided but she still shook lightly with delayed reaction.

"Mer you need to drink this…" Crouched down in front of her Christina held out the glass of water but Meredith shook her head

"Unless it's spiked with vodka I don't want it or you could go one better, tip the water away and fill it with tequila."

"You should drink it," Derek told her softly but ignoring him she closed her eyes to fall into a sleep of exhaustion.

Derek felt Christina looking at him them pointedly at her watch,

"I can't move, unless you want me to wake her?" He couldn't help it he had to grin as her look turned into one of her more familiar downright hostile ones.

"Wont your wife be wondering where you, her **_husband_** is?"

"You really hate me?" she didn't reply so he prompted "Well…"

"Oh was that a question, I thought you were simply stating a very well known fact."

"I love her!"

"Really…"

"My marriage is over."

"This is serious déjà vu…" She sauntered out to the kitchen not giving him any chance to reply.

He laughed, her sarcasm appealed to his sense of humor and he liked her more for the fact Christina always had Meredith's back and he knew as long as Christina was around she would be taken care of but he wanted that job too. He wanted to be the one again who Meredith trusted with her secrets the one she would turn to when life got too much, most of all he wanted to be her everything. He didn't want to be just a painful memory of love gone wrong from her past, the story with which she would warn her own daughters about some day and that tore his heart in two to think of his Meredith having children with anyone but him.

Leaning forward he brushed her hair with a kiss

"Your friends hate me…" he was surprised to be answered by a sleepy voice

"But I don't, I've tried to but I can't!"

"Why cant you?" he brushed the hair from her face so he could see her eyes as she looked up at him.

"For the same reason I would let you eat the last piece of cheesecake…"

It only took that second for him to register what she had said and what it meant before he bent his head and kissed her, they didn't touch anywhere but their lips but they didn't need too. For both of them at that moment their souls met and spoke of the love that for three years had stayed hidden.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7- **

**_Two weeks later. _**

_**Seattle Grace Hospital**_

Derek sat staring down at the coffee in front of him but that wasn't what he saw he was back in the old home of Meredith Grey when the most important kiss in his life had ended.

_Meredith's reaction had startled him to say the least, she'd literally jumped from the sofa out of his arms and ran up to her room locking the door firmly behind her before he'd even had a chance to draw breath. He'd sat outside the door pleading for her to come out and talk for over an hour but her only response had been muffled sobs except for one sentence _

"_You have a wife and I have… I have a …"_

_He knew then he should of told her about him and Addison but he doubted she would of even listened to him she was in no state to hear his marriage as from this morning was over, she would of blamed herself and the last thing he wanted to cause was anymore pain. In the end Christina had managed to persuade him to leave but by the time he got there first thing the next morning she'd gone back to wherever she had come from, they weren't giving that away either and he was half crazy with worry. She had returned for the funeral looking so pale and distraught that his heart had broken for her, but with her four friends constantly at her side he had had no chance of getting within speaking distance of her. Then it had been the same old story she'd gone again and he was left here out of his mind and wondering what the hell he'd done wrong. He knew he'd felt all their old passion and love in that kiss and that she felt something a lot like love for him still but their must be something else going on in her life._

"_I have a… I have a…" But what did she have, there certainly wasn't a husband as she wore no ring and Christina would have happily told him that so what the hell was it?_

"Derek are you okay?" The Chief asked and looking dazed Derek frowned

"Shouldn't I be asking you that?"

"But I'm not the one walking around in a dream, your existing Derek not living!"

"How can I? Tell me how to live without her again, how you can live when you have no idea why the women you love left you or even where she is?" and to this the Chief had no answer.

_**Boston**_

Meredith Grey sat cross legged on her sitting room floor playing with Cameron, toys surrounding them on all sides.

"Boat Mommy?" His chubby fingers held up the toy ferry boat she'd brought back with her, Cameron had fallen in love on sight even insisting he slept with it clasped tightly in his hands.

He was the image of his father from his curly chocolate brown hair to his mesmerizing blue eyes now shining with happiness at having his mommy all to himself, but he had her stubborn chin along with the famous McDreamy charm that made him irresistible to her. Just like his father she thought with a sad smile, it had seemed so natural and right for them to kiss but reality had returned with a smack. She loved him still she had known that but it wasn't just her that could be hurt and most of all how do you go about explaining he has a son she had purposefully kept him from knowing about. It scared her to think of him hating her and then there was Addison, she did not want to be a home wrecker…

"Fone," One hand tugged at her sleeve the other pointing to the ringing handset.

"Sorry Cam, mommy will get it!" She balanced the phone on her shoulder leaving both her hands free to carry on with his game.

"McDreamy is now McDivocee…" Izzy squealed down the phone before she had even had chance to say hello.

"What??" Meredith was unsure whether she was hearing right.

"McDreamy signed, McWife signed… They're all done Mer! Addison is even dating McSteamy…"

"Oh?"

_He's free finally he's free _could_ this be it could this mean???_

"Meredith say something, you love him right you have too???" Izzy sounded impatient and Meredith nodded though Izzy couldn't see "I never stopped…"

"Well then here's your chance for your McLife, oh Mer don't give up on it now! It doesn't have to be just you and Cam any more!"

"I can't Izz, its too late and though its killing me there is just too much water under the whatever!" Meredith finally said already in tears after a long silence.

"But Mer can you be happy without him???" Izzy's voice was now full of concern and Meredith sighed through her tears "Il just have to try."

Putting the phone down she let the tears fall unchecked as Cameron with the same worried look his father would have used he hugged her

"No cry Mommy, no cry!"

_**Seattle Grace Hospital**_

Izzy found Christina, George and Alex eating lunch.

"Okay we know you two hate McDreamy for what he did to Meredith but we have to do something…"

"Why?" George and Christina asked together

"Because Meredith is broke and though we hate it he is the only person who can fix here this time cos we can't!"

"So little Miss Sunshine what do you suggest me, Bambi and Evil Spawn do?"

"I haven't got that far yet but we've all been there from the start of this so it's up to us to fix them cos they can't seem to do it on their own! If not for him we do it for Meredith and Cameron…"

"Well?" Alex looked to Christina

"She's my person… I'm in! But get this straight I'm only going along with this for Meredith!"

All three of them stared at George "I don't get a choice do I?"

**PLEASE READ,ENJOY AND REVIEW…………**


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

"Izzy I'm not sure, it's not really our place to do this…" George followed her gaze across Joe's to where Derek Shepherd was sat alone looking battered by life.

"When I cut Denny's LV wire Meredith stuck by me, Alex failed his boards and slept with Syph nurse but Meredith was the one who got the rest of us to help him study. Christina she was your person for the abortion and George when everyone was calling you 007, she didn't…" As she had spoken Izzy had looked at each one in turn, her eyes a mixture of pleading and persuasion.

"No Meredith just slept with him and cried while they were doing it…" Alex grinned as George nearly fell off his stool with indignation "We don't… That is not the point here!"

"Evil spawn just shut up."

"Crack whore go…"

"Alex, Christina!" Izzy shouted bringing their attention away from each other and back to her,

"Please it's our turn…"

"When you're doing the whole preppy, cheerleader thing I really miss Meredith, dark twisty Meredith!!" Christina scowled only for Izzy to stick her tongue out.

"Well use that feeling as your motivation to do a good thing."

"Telling a dude he has a kid he has no idea about, is that really classed as a good thing?" Alex queried only for his foot to be stamped on

"You will start to think so unless you want to sleep alone tonight and every night…'

With a final nod to the three of them Izzy walked over to where Derek was sat and waited till he acknowledged her presence

"Can I help you Dr Stevens?" tired blue eyes were raised to her face as she stared down at him.

"I want to fix you… I mean I want to help you, can I sit down?"

"You want to fix me…" he repeated with a ghost of a smile.

"Well yes actually we all do, you see Meredith is our friend and we all know she loved you but you … …" as she hesitated he finished for her

"But I broke her!" No ghost of a smile now in fact he looked grim but Izzy was determined

"Yes you broke her, so we helped pick up the pieces and helped her to mend but then… Well there was the prom… …"

"Do you have a point Dr Stevens or do you simply enjoy listing my past mistakes?" His voice somber he threw back the rest of his scotch in one causing Izzy to turn beseeching brown eyes in Christina's direction.

"Oh for god's sake this was her idea…" Christina muttered coming over to take the third seat

"Where did you get to before chickening out?"

"The prom." Izzy whispered as Derek watched them feeling both curious and wary as he wondered where the hell this was going.

"Right so you had sex that night. But you see McDreamy you left Meredith with lot more than simple memories of hot adulterous exam room sex…" Christina was blunt, Derek speechless stared from her then back to Izzy

"She didn't know and by the time she did she had left Seattle and you were back with your wife!"

"Are you two saying what I think you are????"

His senses were reeling and he couldn't tear his eyes from Izzy's face as he remembered the words he'd been playing over and over in his mind for two weeks. _"I have a … I have a…"_

"Look for one moment before you get angry put yourself in Meredith's shoes; imagine her pain at leaving knowing that she might never see you again then only to find out she had something to hold onto…something that came from you and her … Your baby!" Izzy retrieved something from her bag and placed it on the table

"Her address is on the back,"

They moved away but Izzy didn't get far before retracing her steps,

"You love her she loves you, your it for her we know that and though it wasn't our place to tell you we had no choice… You see she's broken but we cant fix her this time, we're her family but your… well you're her McDreamy!" Her smile was sad as she moved away and Derek simply stared after her unable to process everything they had said.

Slowly he looked down at the photo and felt his whole world stop; it was him, him in the photos all over his mother's home but with two differences. This little boy didn't have his chin; he had a miniature of Meredith's stubborn one

And the women sat laughing love in her eyes wasn't his mother, it was the woman who had saved him, the love of his life, it was Meredith Grey.

They had a son, a son conceived on the night they'd stopped fighting and given into a love so strong that neither could walk away from it without leaving their hearts behind. A son who he didn't want to grow up not knowing his father or not knowing how much his parents loved each other and him. Izzy and Christina had given him this final chance and he wasn't going to let it go to waste and whether Meredith Grey liked it or not she would listen with no more running away.

PLEASE READ, ENJOY AND REVIEW… I WANT TO KNOW WHAT YOU THINK ON HOW DEREK FOUND OUT???


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

Derek stood in front of the Chiefs desk waiting impatiently for him to finish his call, he was a bag of nervous energy and standing still was nearly killing him.

"I have to take some time off," Derek jumped in as soon as the handset was back in its cradle.

"How long?" Richard asked rubbing tired eyes.

"However long it takes to persuade the most crazily stubborn and infuriating women I have ever met that I love her and that I deserve to be a part of hers and my own son's life," a glimmer of his old smile rejuvenating his face.

"You know then," Tiredness forgotten Richard leaned forward in his seat.

"You knew then," Derek countered for his old friend to nod

"She told me when she was here, I couldn't break her trust Derek I hope you can understand that?"

_He understood that Meredith was the daughter of a women Richard had been deeply in love with and Meredith's similarity to her revoked cherished memories of their short time together, giving her a place of her own in his heart. _

_Last night he wouldn't have understood, but last night he had been full of all consuming anger with a strange feeling of awe and wonder that left him not knowing what to do or even sure of what he felt. But the anger had soon turned inwards and away from Meredith, he'd put her through hell and he couldn't blame her for leaving, for not wanting an innocent child to be dragged into the mess he had created. So much time had been wasted time when the three of them could have been happy together._

"I understand,"

Richard stopped him before he could leave the office

"Do it right this time Derek, though she loves you there is only so much pain any love can withstand, you might not have another chance and I would hate for _you _to have regrets in thirty years…"

It was as he was leaving the hospital that he bumped into Christina and Izzy coming in to start their shifts

"You know if you screw this up I'll kill you and make it look like an accident..." Christina threatened while Izzy gave him a smile

"I'm normally not a violent person but if you do then I will so help her… good luck!"

As soon as he landed in Boston he hired a car and headed straight for where he knew she would be. Derek didn't want to waste time finding a hotel or unpacking because he was scared, scared that any second now he would wake up back in his trailer in the lonely hell that had been his life ever since he lost her.

Reaching the hospital he found his way to the surgical floor and she was there stood chatting with another doctor at the nurse's station just like he'd seen her do a million times before. Hair which he knew would smell like lavender tied at the nape of her neck, light blue scrubs covering her gentle curves looking as beautiful as she had that first night in Joe's. And he was lost, lost to love, lost to her so he stood and simply watched taking in every detail but something was different something had changed and then it hit him.

Meredith didn't feel at home here, the petit brunette was obviously a friend but not her family; she wasn't Christina, Izzy, George or Alex. She hadn't held Meredith up when her strength was gone, carried her home from Joe's after too much tequila or put the pieces of her heart back together. Derek watched her face closely it was guarded holding back not letting anyone see the real Meredith Grey, she didn't belong here. She belonged at Seattle Grace with the people who know and love her but most of all with him.

"Meredith that man hasn't taken his eyes off you once in the last five minutes lucky girl, with all that hair and those eyes he's positively dreamy!"

Rachel's words hit her like a slap in the face and she knew instinctively that somehow when she turned he would be stood watching her just as he had done countless times before. Tempted to run only one thing stopped her she didn't seem able to move.

"He's coming over, god he's gorgeous and no wedding ring either!!!"

Derek knew as he took each step that this was the most significant moment of his life and if he screwed up he would never forgive himself and his life wouldn't be worth living once Christina got hold of him. He read the confusion in her eyes the distrust in her rigid body so taking one more deep breath he reached for her hand.

"I had this long speech prepared but now…. I'm stood looking at you and all I can say is I'm in love with you I've been in love with you forever…" As he said those words for the first time he smiled a purely boyish infectious smile that invited the whole world to smile with him

"I'm over three years late in saying that I know, but Meredith it's always been you, your it for me!" Ignoring the collective sigh from the people around them shamelessly listening in he never took his eyes off her face.

"Derek..." Her voice shook as tears escaped to leave glistening trails down her flushed cheeks. "I can't go through it again; I'm just not strong enough."

When she tried to draw her hand away he tightened his grip using it to pull her reluctant body closer

"I will never forgive myself for all the pain I caused but please put your trust in me, give me one more chance to get it right."

Meredith had forgotten everything but him as soon as their eyes locked; it hadn't crossed her mind how he had found her all she saw was him. But did she have the strength to do this then again did she have the power to walk away.

"It's different now I'm not that girl any more…"

Realizing they were putting on a show for the whole hospital he started to move pulling her behind him

"We need to talk but not here…" Not waiting for an answer he pulled her into the nearest stairwell leaning back against the door to block her exit.

It was that bang that broke the spell his unexpected presence had weaved and suddenly she was angry,

"How the hell did you find me???" she demanded only to be more infuriated by her own self betrayal as her heart flipped at the sound of his intoxicating chuckle.

"If I told you I guarantee you'd never believe me."

"Try me," Green eyes were shooting sparks now and Derek knew she was on the point of using those tiny ineffectual fists he adored to do him some damage. Grabbing her arms and holding them at her sides he shook her slightly

"Its not important do you hear me Meredith? What is is that I **know everything** and this time you're not running away this is it!" He spoke quietly but his words were forceful his eyes searching hers for any other sign of reaction than anger

"We can sort through this, I love you and I want to love our son! Let me be in your lives let me love you both Meredith?"

**PLEASE READ, ENJOY AND REVIEW… LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK ABOUT DEREK IN THIS CHAPTER DID I GET IT RIGHT???? **

**THE NEXT CHAPTER WILL BE MEREDITH'S REACTION AND HOW SHE HANDLES IT!**


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

"Cameron his name is Cameron, and he isn't yours Derek he's mine..." she shouted at him as she shook herself free but he didn't seem to be listening

"Cameron…" he said the name as if he was tasting it for the first time, a smile transformed his face

"I like it, in fact I think I'll grow to love it…"

"No Derek… No I won't let you do this again?" Meredith was shouting but Derek's face remained impassive which annoyed her more.

"Do what?" He raised his eyebrows for a second only to drop them as he grinned wickedly "Do you know you're at your most beautiful when you're mad!!!"

"Derek listen to me, this is not happening not now not ever, I will not let you build me up only to knock me down again."

"I won't." He reached out to touch her but Meredith purposely avoided it knowing it would only take one touch and she would be lost.

"You will, you can't help it it's who you are and I don't blame you for it…"

"I know you still love me…"

He said it as if he believed it but even he was starting to have doubts, Derek hadn't expected her to just fall into his arms but Meredith was putting up one hell of a fight. Sighing she smiled for the first time, it was a poignant smile that filled him with regret for every tear he had caused her to cry.

"Of course I do, I have never stopped but… …"

"There doesn't have to be any buts not anymore." Derek was frightened now, he knew she loved him but maybe Richard had been right that even the strongest love could only take so much pain.

"I love you… …"

"Stop it, please stop saying that…" Meredith could feel the tears and hated herself for letting him see how much he could still effect her.

"Why?"

"Because when you do I … …"

"What??" Ignoring the rejection written clearly in her body language he cupped her cheek the satin smooth skin soft against his palm, the wetness of her tears, he could feel it all. Along with her barriers crumbling, felled by this simple touch.

"You make me want to believe, to lose myself in you and if I do what happens when I cant pick myself up again?"

"You wont have to because I'll be there…" he whispered pulling her finally in to his arms, waiting for her body to relax and melt into his embrace

"I chose you, I pick you and I will always love you." This he said half to himself as he buried his face in the sweet lavender of her hair while Meredith shut her eyes smiling at those words. He may be incredibly late but she was just thankful to hear him saying them finally. They stayed like that in silence simply reminding themselves what it felt like to hold the other and know this wasn't for the last time.

"I tried so hard to forget you! I wanted to because I was so angry with you for leaving but I couldn't, I could not get over you… Its us, its meant to be us… I'm your McDreamy." He ended with a disbelieving chuckle "Good god did I really just call myself that???"

Leaning back in his arms she looked up at him, a laugh in her eyes as she nodded "Oh you did…" Before becoming serious "This is it Derek no more chances and we cant just slip back into what we once had, we have to take it slow!!!"

"Me, you and Cameron…" He smiled a truly happy smile, feeling as if for the second time Meredith Grey had saved him from drowning to breathe fresh air into his life.

"Cameron George Alexander Grey…" She whispered as Derek bent his head to finally kiss her which caused him to stop in his tracks,

"You named my son after O'Malley and Karev???"

He chuckled brushing her lips gently once before he sank into the kiss dragging her with him as she matched him passion for passion until they were both all but gasping for breath. Resting forehead to forehead Meredith suddenly shrieked.

"Izzy! It was Izzy! You said you were my McDreamy it has to be Izzy!" Meredith pulled back slightly disbelief all over her face a look so adorable Derek kissed her again swiftly.

"Your thinking about Isabelle Stevens… Right now your thinking about Izzy, seriously?"

"George… Alex… Christina… it was them too wasn't it? Your freaking kidding me?" After nodding along to each name he shook his head, so enjoying the emotions passing over her face.

"Apparently their dislike of me falls way short of their love for you and our son …"

"Christina… really?"

"Mmm though when I last saw her she did threaten to kill me and make it look like an accident if I did get this wrong!"

"That's my person! I was a little worried she might of gone soft because of being around Izzy so much... Im so glad she hasnt."

Her smile irresistible to him he kissed her again, indulging himself for all the times she'd been missing from his arms.

"Come home with me Meredith, come back to your family they have missed you nearly as much as I have," he murmured huskily against her lips to send shivers of desire shooting through her. But tearing herself from him she walked away a little, only to stop and hold out her hand.

"Come on you still have to meet my mini McDreamy," Meredith laughed as he took her hand to follow her down the stairs,

"You will never let me forget that I actually called myself that will you?" Still laughing she shook her head and Derek couldn't stop himself from laughing along with her.

They stopped outside the hospital crèche's window both searching the room for their small boy.

"Sometimes I think he looks so much like you to make sure I never forgot you or what we shared…" Her eyes on her son as Derek's grip on her hand tightened. His own eyes glued to the smaller version of himself that had a toy ferry boat clutched in his hand.

"He has a ferry boat…" He was more than amused he was falling in love, irreversibly unconditionally in love for the second time in his life and then he understood.

"We'll go as slow as you need…" He knew now what she had meant, they needed time each one of them. Time to adjust, time to become a family.

"Meredith…" he spoke gently his gaze not wavering from Cameron "You never answered my question, will you come home with me?"

**PLEASE READ, ENJOY AND REVIEW!!! **

**ALSO I'D REALLY LIKE TO KNOW WHAT YOU THOUGHT OF MEREDITH'S REACTION. I THINK THE NEXT CHAPTER WILL FINISH THIS STORY OFF!**


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11**

_**Emerald City Bar, Seattle**_

"She'll be fine I mean she won't hate us for this right?" Izzy asked George and Alex but neither look convinced as George tried but failed to reassure her.

"No… Meredith will understand of course she will, wont she?"

"007 wake up… McDreamy will flash that cocky grin of his then give her one of his longing to kiss you looks and they'll be doing the nasty nasty in some elevator! Please this is Meredith we're discussing, you know the girl who got knocked up in an exam room by her ex who was also her married boss!" Christina joined them at the bar making everyone laugh.

"It's been two weeks…" George said looking unsure again and Alex shrugged it away,

"Lots of missed screaming orgasms to make up for…"

"Or if it has all gone wrong she'll be at some bar just like this one telling the barman how crap her friends are as she knocks back shot after shot of tequila while she waits to break another guy's penis!" Joe put in putting a beer in front of Christina.

"Oh crap Izz, what did you do???"

"Me… Alex thought it was a good idea too and you didn't exactly stop it happening George!" At this Alex choked on his beer as he turned to look at Izzy.

"It was you and crack whore here who told the dude where she is and all about Cam…"

"Go play with Syph nurse evil spawn…"

The women stood a few feet behind them unseen and enjoying their argument finally moved forward laughing,

"And I was worried Christina Yang had gone soft…" Meredith broke in before Alex could answer causing George to fall off his seat in shock and the other three to jump off their stools and rush towards her.

Christina pushed the others ruthlessly aside so she could reach her first and hugged her tightly with the last edge of awkwardness gone.

"Please say your back for good; I can't take much more of the Brady bunch… They express their emotions not bottle it all up like normal people..." Drawing back Meredith grinned at her best friend.

"Could I possibly leave my person to face that extreme torture all alone, again?" she whispered before being grabbed by George and then swung off her feet by Alex.

Izzy hesitated before letting out a sob as Meredith embraced her,

"Thank you," Meredith said smiling as Izzy wiped the tears away and Christina groaned

"See what I mean… Emotion! It's seriously sickening!"

"So what will it be?" Joe asked and the five of them burst into fresh laughter

"Tequila!"

"Just the one Derek and Cameron are waiting outside."

"You only one…" Joe shook his head "this is so wrong'

Derek lent against the car Cameron in his arms, the night was warm the sky clear so he was able to point out the different constellations. But his mind was going back over the previous two weeks, the happiest he could he could ever remember and he knew the future could only get better.

The first week they had spent the days together going to the park, zoo or just lazing around watching cartoons but the nights he had returned after putting Cameron to bed to his hotel alone. It was only in the last few days Meredith had let him back into her bed as well as her heart but now back in Seattle he wasn't sure if that would continue. The contract at the hospital would be signed tomorrow but where he would wake up tomorrow morning he wasn't so sure.

"It suits you..." A familiar voice said softly as she approached him.

"Addy," Derek wasn't sure how to react or even where this was heading so he decided to let her take the lead.

"What's his name?" Addison asked ignoring the tiny ache in her heart as two identical pairs of blue eyes looked her over suspiciously before Cameron broke the silence.

"Cameron…" He gave her his biggest smile causing Addison to push any niggling regrets away, who could not love a little boy so like Derek.

Plus Derek looked happy and really that's all she had ever wanted for him even though she had once hoped he would find it with her. But if Meredith and their son were the ones to do it then she couldn't and wouldn't hold it against them.

"Oh are you going to break some hearts…"

"Me cute." He chuckled and Addison looked sardonically at Derek,

"DNA has a lot to answer for…"

"Mmm he's already tearing heads off the little girl's dolls at crèche to look inside them so I hope that's a good sign!" Addison laughed at this and for the first time in so long they laughed comfortably together before she became more serious.

"Don't hurt her again Derek, they deserve more …"

"So do you Addy, id hate to see you in pain again?"

"Mark you mean?"

"By anyone, I hope we can be friends one day?' he said sincerely and she nodded

"So do I, Meredith too. But what about you and Mark?"

Derek took a few moments before he shrugged his shoulders

"I guess over time even the deepest wounds heal!" He answered and she nodded knowing this would please Mark, as all he wanted now was Derek to forgive him.

"See you Derek, take care."

"You too Addison!" he said before she walked back across to the hospital.

It was ten more minutes before Meredith came out, a smile lighting up her whole face as she saw her two favorite people waiting for her as she always dreamed they would be.

"You stink of tequila," Derek teased as he kissed her and she gave a slightly tipsy chuckle

"It was my welcome home drink they wouldn't let me stop at one!"

"So where too?" He was a little nervous now and it showed in his slightly crooked smile but as she looked up at him with a combination of love and desire in her eyes a slow grin grew.

"We're going home to put Cameron to bed then to test out the padded headboard Izzy brought us…" Her lips moving closer and closer to his as he laughed till he couldn't resist and still laughing he kissed her, a kiss to seal the promise of their future together.

**READ, ENJOY AND REVIEW!! **

**AS IT'S THE LAST CHAPTER WERE YOU SATISFIED WITH THE WAY IT ENDED???**


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